All You Have to Do

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Never liked you much since you came to work for me.

No, I never liked you much since you came to work for me.

You think you’re so smart but you’re not as smart as me.

All you have to do is just do what I say.

All you have to do is don’t get in my way.

It’ll all be so easy if you just do it my way.

You say I don’t know what I want. Well, maybe I do.

You say I don’t know what I want. Well, maybe that’s true.

You’re so smart –– go figure it out. That’s all you have to do.

You say things are complicated. Well, I don’t see why.

You say you gotta think your work out. Well, I don’t see why.

You just have to walk on water or make some pigs fly.

Bobby gets me good numbers — makes them up faster than you.

They really prove my point — and he makes them up faster than you.

He’ll get me a nice raise. That’s all you have to do.

You say you need praise for the good things you do.

You say you need praise for the hard work you do.

Don’t need to tell my wife I love her — she knows it from how I screw.

Saw you’ve got some nice chocolates over there in your desk.

Always did love chocolates like those ones in your desk.

You don’t mind if I try one. I think this one’s the best.

See those towers of papers? They all need my review.

Go to every meeting — see my calendar’s full, too?

’Cause my opinion’s admired. That’s all you have to do.

Know about your whispers. You all think you’re so shrewd.

Yeah, I know about your lies. Know your plans to get me, too.

Well, you can’t win. Lie back down. That’s all you have to do.

Go walk yourself out. I can do my job and yours, too.

You’re expendable here. I can do my job and yours, too.

Just show me the On button. That’s all you have to do.

Cohen is an IT security analyst at a small government contractor. She generally writes fiction or technical documentation, with the occasional digression into poetry when she knows what she wants to say.

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