It’s no longer enough to give a present. We must “gift” something. Giving is so low brow. Important people gift. “Hello, my subject…I gift you mine blessing. Now, go!”

Could other words be similarly improved? Instead of driving, we could go drifting. Mere living is not enough – we should be lifting. For what you have done to me, I magnanimously forgift you.

The best gifting phrase lately was handed down by Judge Judy who turned her governing talents into a $47 million a year private job. (The reality TV door swings both ways.) Judge Judy says that she and her husband like to give “with a warm hand.” If their children need help with a house or college costs, Judy and Jerry are happy to give while they’re still alive. I’ve seen many people stringing along their children, and those children reacting with some delight when their stingy parents died. “Giving with a warm hand” seems like a better way to manage the love of one’s family.

You can gift framed stock certificates from I once gifted my wife a share of Tiffany & Company, which annoys her with dividend checks in amounts like 11 cents. In the last five years, TIF has gone from $83.19 to $85.94, but has held its value better than most jewelry pieces, which despite the ardent guarantees of salespeople, are rarely purchased at a higher price than their initial sale.

Like many children, my son once owned a share of Walt Disney Company (DIS), which was the most decorated and popular stock certificate on GiveAShare. The many minor shareholders must have irritated Disney because they discontinued stock certificates in 2013. Still, my son and I enjoyed the 2004 Disney shareholder meeting in Philadelphia in which DIS rejected Comcast’s $54 billion takeover proposal. DIS is now worth $167 billion; Comcast, $168 billion. Since 2004, one share of DIS has climbed from $22 to $112.

GiveAShare sells a genuine registered share of Medical Marijuana Inc (MNJA) in a premium frame for just $114. The share is valued at 9 cents. [Insert your own marijuana valuation joke here.] MNJA recently climbed 28 percent from 7 cents. The company has a market cap of $302 million. Shareholders are hoping for 100-to-1 reverse spliff. I mean split.

Suppose you wanted to give a child a small portfolio that might encourage an interest in business. Until recently, even discounted commissions would wipe out small trades., however, charges only regulatory fees per trade, and makes its money on ancillary services. You can build a tiny portfolio for less than $100. It takes three business days to fund the account, but I found that I could buy stocks the next day. ATTENTION: your Robinhood account is linked to your bank, so DO NOT give away your password and login. You could give the account with a letter agreement, and set up a small portfolio on Yahoo Finance that mirrors the Robinhood portfolio to prevent the kind of panicky, childish sell-off common to adults.

Let’s pick a gift portfolio of five companies for a young child. First, let’s find low prices so we can buy whole shares. Second, it would be fun to have some moonshot opportunities for drama. This is a buy-and-hold for a decade portfolio, so we’re looking for companies that might stay around. And it wouldn’t hurt to have some brand names. Here are my five:

nLight Inc. (LASR) makes lasers and sells for $19.20. It’s profitable, has a ton of cash and a cool website ( LASR has that beautiful chart where it went public, shot up, and came straight down. The excitement is over, and they can start working their plan. Also, did I mention that they make lasers?

Skechers (SKX) makes shoes and fashion items, and sells for $23.50. Sales in the last five years have grown profitably from $1.8 billion to $4.1 billion.

Casa Systems (CASA) makes 5G solutions for broadband networks and is one of the leading purveyors of acronyms. Insiders bought 116 million shares in the last 12 months. Sales in the last four years have grown from $211 million to $351 million, and it sells for $14.70.

Kimball Electronics (KE) was originally the electronic organ division of Kimball pianos. Since spun out, KE produces electronics for the automotive, medical, industrial and public safety markets. Selling at $16.40, KE has grown steadily and profitably to $1 billion in sales, and also shows net insider purchases.

Cato Corp. (CATO) is a specialty fashion retailer with declining sales, declining share price ($13.70), a 9 percent dividend, and 200,000 shares purchased by insiders in the last 12 months. CATO also owns the Cedar Hill National Bank, which exists solely to service the CATO credit card. The last good thing that Sears ever did was Discover Card, which is now worth $22 billion. CATO doesn’t have the distribution of Sears, but it does have 1,300 stores and is headquartered in Charlotte, which is a banking town. CATO has $210 million in cash and short-term investments and no long-term debt. Retailing is hard, but CATO makes money, and it could be one of those interesting situations that looks like one thing, but is hiding value in another.

There you have it: a five-stock portfolio for about $90. And you’ll have the pleasure of whispering, “Hey, kid – your biggest expense in all of life is taxes. If you make money on these and hold them for at least a year, you’ll pay zero taxes on your gains up to $38,600.”

NOTE: I bought these stocks one morning, and had already lost $1.10 by the time I wrote this later that day. Prices will change by the time of publication. Investments are inherently risky. No one is qualified to predict the future.

To comment, suggest a perfect company, or ask a question, please e-mail

A 1979 graduate of Princeton University, Paul founded Clancy Paul Computers in 1981. After selling the business to a national firm in 1989, Paul has engaged in a variety of business endeavors, from an online photo processing company to a firm that helps nurses diagnose wounds and order wound care materials from a patient’s bedside. Several years ago Paul started the Trenton Digital Initiative to help bring affordable Internet connectivity to financially challenged families.

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